Systematically unsystematic

I love systems.  And office supplies.  I have never met a planning system with color coding that I didn’t think I could use to transform my life.  And yet, here I am, mostly untransformed.

 

The thing about systems is that they want things to fit.  Tasks need to be categorized.  Hours need to be accounted for.  Nothing must be wasted.

 

Life, on the other hand, doesn’t care if stuff fits.  (This is why lycra was invented.)  No matter how carefully we write our workout on the calendar in the correct color of pen, life can still say, “Hey, but the car is going to break down right then and actually we’re going to spend the day talking to tow people and insurance agents and repair guys.”  We can plan the perfect workout that uses every single muscle group the optimum amount and life can hand us food poisoning instead.

 

I am not saying that we shouldn’t plan.  I’m just saying that we need to understand that life is bigger than our plans.  The world is not going to end if we miss one workout, or even if we write it on the chart in the wrong color.  If we end up getting in our steps pacing the hospital corridors while we wait to hear about a loved one’s test results, that still counts.  If someone offers us a spontaneous hike to see waterfalls, we don’t need to say no because we were planning on lifting weights right then.

 

The system is not important.  We are important.  When the system doesn’t serve us, we need to ignore it.

 

Go play. 

Everybody's Doing It

None of us does the same workout.  Even if we do the exact same exercises in the exact same order, we are different humans so our workouts are not going to do the same things in our bodies.  What this means is that we have permission to modify.  Heck, maybe we even have an obligation to modify.

This is where I point out that modifications are not static entities.  For example, sometimes we modify because a particular version of an exercise is not appropriate for us at the moment.  As we continue to work on that exercise, we need to modify our modifications.

 

Safety modifications can be either temporary or permanent.  Those of us who become pregnant need to make some adjustments to keep ourselves and our future progeny safe before returning to business as usual afterwards.  (Note:  afterwards will not be the same body as before and this is all good.)  On the other hand, when we receive a diagnosis of osteoporosis, we need to change our workouts forever to avoid spinal flexion.

 

No matter why we are modifying, the point of modifications is to make our workouts work for us.

 

We can do this.

Monday Workout: Compound

I love compound exercises!  So much work in so little time!  Three rounds.

 

 

squat heel lift	30
(lunge to) curl	20
Arnold press	10
kb swings	30
kb twists	20
kb 8s	10
woodchoppers	30
lateral raise	20
V sit press	10

 

The Amazing Stickie and Roll-Up

Today the Amazing Stickie is working on her spinal articulation.  People who have osteopenia and osteoporosis should not do this exercise; Stickie has no actual bones, so this is not a problem for her.

She begins lying on her back with her arms at her sides (beginning with arms overhead is also all right).  She takes a big inhale.  As she exhales, she curls herself up until she is in a sitting position with her back straight and her arms extended in front of her in what she and I like to call Zombie Position.  She takes a big breath in and then as she exhales she curls back down to the starting position.

 

For those of us who find this too difficult, Stickie is also demonstrating the assisted version of the exercise, which begins with the legs in tabletop position.  The extra leverage from the weight of the legs helps us get our spines off the floor.

 

No matter which option we choose, three to five repetitions are enough.

The Amazing Stickie and Side Lunge Row and Raise

Today the Amazing Stickie is working lots of muscles doing the side lunge row and raise.

She begins in her side lunge position holding a dumbbell in the arm by her straight leg.  She rows the arm up so that the dumbbell is by her shoulder and then presses it overhead.  She returns to the starting position.

 

Sets of 15 on a side are good.

Sadly, workouts are rarely like sundaes

Every once in a while, I have a conversation that reminds me that I need to review the basics of something.  Someone recently asked me about working more on cardio.  This person basically forgot how interval training works, so I’m going to go over it for everyone.

What we are doing when we do cardio training is teaching our hearts and lungs to recover more quickly from exertion.  We do need some base cardio endurance for things like an unexpectedly long or steep hike, or surprise stairs.  We do want to be able to finish the dog walk without passing out.  One way to get that basic endurance is to do those things.  Walk for half an hour.  Hop on a bike or spin bike or elliptical trainer.  Go for a run.  This is called steady state cardio training.  We go at about the same speed for the whole time we’re doing whatever it is we’re doing.  It is a great way to begin, but not a great way to keep going forever.  Even people who do endurance events like century rides and marathons don’t just ride or run forever and think they’ve got enough training.

 

What we want to do, once we have enough oomph built up to do maybe fifteen minutes of steady-state cardio like brisk walking, is add intervals.  Intervals are short bursts of more intense work sprinkled across the workout.  If the workout were a sundae, intervals are the jimmies.

 

If we are working out on gym equipment, chances are that the machine already has a built-in interval program.  Chances are it is also not optimal, but it is an all right place to start.  A lot of those pre-programmed interval workouts have intervals that are too long—two of three minutes of harder work followed by the same amount of recovery.  Again, this is not a bad way to try interval training, but there is an easier way.

 

Whatever cardio thing we are doing, once we are warmed up, we want to add short (about a minute) bursts of intense activity to them.  So if we are fairly new to working out and we are doing a neighborhood walk for cardio, we go at our usual brisk pace until we’re warmed up.  Then we go as fast as we can to the end of the next block.  We slow back down until our heart rate and breathing recover, and then we do it again.  That minute is important, because in a minute we use up all our readily available quick-burn energy.  The other energy pathways available to us aren’t as easy to access and take more time.  We want to use the quick stuff and then give it a chance to refuel before burning it again.

 

The science shows that this kind of training improves general cardio fitness faster than steady state endurance cardio.  That means that when we do interval training, we are automatically making that steady state cardio easier.

 

Short version:  warm up; do a fast minute; do a slower minute or two; do a fast minute; do a slow minute or two; repeat until time to cool down; cool down; rest.

Maybe I'm Not the Only One Who Forgot That Part?

A long time ago now, my older kid watched Monty Python and the Holy Grail for the first time.  He was my first child and I tried to be careful to avoid exposing him to inappropriate things as much as I could (yes, this is hilarious, in retrospect, but at the time I was very young and earnest and innocent).  Having played back what I could remember of the movie in my head, I thought it would be fine, that he’d laugh, and we’d all had a good time.  I totally forgot the scene when Galahad gets to Castle Anthrax.  There are many things one does not necessarily want one’s child to yell excitedly at kindergarten and at least one of them occurs in that scene.  But I did not come here to tell a funny anecdote about my kid.  I mention the scene because later in the scene, when the other knights come to rescue Galahad, he asks if he can have just a little peril.  Which in context is hilarious.

In fitness, we, too, want a little peril, although maybe not from the activities Galahad was contemplating at the time.  (One would have to be VERY vigorous to get a workout out of that, frankly.)  What I mean is that we don’t want to be too comfortable in our workouts.

 

Now, I spend a fair amount of time making sure that people are comfortable in their workouts.  This is because many people have exercise anxiety, or a cultural expectation that workouts have to make them feel like dying, or concern about an old injury, or the like.  Workouts need to be a normal part of our existence, not some terrifying visitation of punishment.

 

However, if workouts are too comfortable, we don’t grow from them.  We need just a little peril.  We need to have a certain amount of doubt that we can, in fact, finish that last rep.  We need to push ourselves a little past where we are confident.  Not so far that we get hurt or even that we trigger large fears, but a little.

 

The underlying principle here is that we need a particular kind of peril, called eustress, to make positive adaptations.  Eustress is the kind of stress that is good for us.  It’s just difficult enough that we can manage it, but not so hard that it kills us (or gives us Black Knight type flesh wounds).

 

Go play.  And play hard.  With just a little peril.