Ritual but no sacrifice

Almost all of the Pilates sessions I do start with the same few exercises.  Partly this is because I want to make sure that there is some warm-up before we get down to more challenging work and because there are some basics I want to make sure we do on a regular basis.  But a deeper reason is about plugging in to the session.

Clients don’t always exactly arrive when they walk through the studio door.  They’re full of traffic or work or grocery lists or that phone call from their auntie.  They have to get their shoes off and deal with jackets and water bottles and all the usual paraphernalia.  I check in about how their bodies are doing as we do the first few moves.  We take a minute or two to move with the breath.  And by the third or fourth movement, they’re really with me, in part because we do the same routine at every arrival.  We have set it up as a sign for the body to tune in to the mind’s channel and vice versa.

Similarly, almost every session ends with a standing extension, arms up to the sky like the Olympic salute.  Extension is about inhalation and tends to raise the energy level.  It makes people feel good.  We go out on a high.

Little rituals can make a big difference.

Two things

One of the most important things I do when I meet with clients for the first time is ask them about what they want out of their workouts, even if they don’t really know the answer.  We have enough of a cultural idea that working out is good that some people come because they have a general sense that they should rather than some specific goal.

However, in the course of conversation, I can usually find out what underlies that general sense in the specific person in front of me.  Sometimes there’s a doctor lurking in the background with some less-than-optimal test results.  Maybe there is a reunion coming up and those retro jeans are not going to be flattering.  Some people want more energy.  Some want to be thinner.  Some want to be able to chase their toddlers or teens.  Knowing what the goal is helps me get what motivates my clients and then I can design workouts that work.

Weight loss clients need to be building lean muscle mass to burn more calories.  They also need to focus on cardio on non-weight-training days and to track what they’re eating.  Toddler chasers need interval work.  People with cholesterol issues should ensure that they’re getting enough cardio.

Some of those folks will respond well to things like Fitbit trackers.  Lots of people have told me about how they decided to run up and down the stairs for a few minutes just to make sure that they hit their 10,000 steps.  Others will want to see scale numbers or looser pants.  Some want to see the dumbbells get bigger.  Others want to be able to reach their toes.

With goals and motivational tactics, we can do anything!

It's not the time that's the issue...

I’ve been doing more writing in my non-work time, which means that I’ve been talking with other people who write.  The obstacles to writing are often the same as the ones people face with working out.  Possibly the biggest one is what people often call time management.

I’m not sure I believe in time management.  I mean, sure, there are more and less efficient ways to do tasks.  Usually, though, it’s not that we’re inefficient or that some optimal method is going to save us all that much time.  It’s usually that we have to manage some kind of emotion that is keeping us from starting in the first place.

Often that emotion is fear.  We are afraid that we can’t handle whatever it is we are trying to do:  lose weight, get strong, lower our cholesterol, avoid knee surgery.  We might fail.  We might also succeed, which would mean that we are actually strong and powerful and knowing that might change other things in our lives.  We might be afraid that we’ll get hurt.  We can deal with fear in lots of ways:  take a friend, take a deep breath, offer ourselves bribes…

Sometimes the emotion is dislike.  I happen to like a lot of kinds of working out, but if I ended up signed up for a daily golf class or regular softball, I would be less than excited.  Ditto marathon training.  I’m also probably not going to excel at figure skating or gymnastics, although I could have fun failing at it.  The first thing to try is something else.  There are so many ways to work out.  Almost everyone can find one that they don’t hate.  And if that doesn’t work, we can choose whatever is done fastest, which probably means some kind of interval circuit where we can get in and get done in about half an hour.

Sometimes the feeling is unworthiness.  One way to tell that this one is working is that we procrastinate by doing all kinds of other good and responsible things for other people, like laundry and cooking and cleaning and planning the perfect theme birthday party and curating the optimal playlist for the drive to and from work or school so that everyone arrives refreshed and energized.  Listen closely:  we deserve to be healthy and happy.  Also:  we are not the only ones who can wash/cook/clean/plan/curate and those around us had better practice in case we don’t manage to work out this whole healthy living and we suddenly drop dead next week.  Let me repeat:  we deserve to be healthy and happy.

We are strong enough to start.  Once we start, we will get even stronger.  We can do this.